Ramblings and rants about the amusing, stupid things that happen to me in and around Cincinnati.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Still Not Smoking

Made it beyond the four week mark! Nuff said.

Calf Roping And My Daughter

Before I begin, I must throw out a qualifying statement. The tickets were FREE.

Candice and I went to the Longhorn Rodeo Sunday because Donatos had a suite at the arena. It was a different experience. We were going to count the mullets in the audience. Surprisingly, we didn't see any. We did see one dude walking around with spurs on his boots and many cowboy hats, but no mullets.

The bronco riding was cool, but the calf roping was so uncool. Those poor little animals getting practically strangled, whiplashed and tied up by the feet while the horses would (sometimes) start dragging them around. Candice was upset and saying "stop it, you're hurting them." I looked over at her and she had tears streaming down her face. My sweet little girl was crying at the rodeo.

Candice, I may tell everybody about this, but I'm not making fun of you. That was one of the most endearing moments ever and I adore you.

Boo Hoo Danny Graves Revisited

You may recall our favorite Cincinnati Reds pitcher (said with sarcasm) whom was fired for flipping off a spectator. Well this just in from Jim...

"Far be it from us to mock a guy for going back to rediscover his roots and promote the game of baseball internationally … but sweet God, what has happened to former Reds reliever Danny Graves? When you get back from Vietnam, before you head to Indians training camp … might we suggest a workout regimen? Like, a serious one?"

Smeriously!

Monday, January 30, 2006

Skating With Fucktards

This stupid show on Fox has replaced my beloved Arrested Development. The final four AD episodes are on next Friday, February 10, 2006. Instead of outright canceling the show, Fox wants to see what kind of numbers come in on the 10th.

Ummmm, guys, isn't this kind of futile? Scheduling it against the Olympic opening ceremonies? Christ, just axe it already so Showtime can pick it up! And keep up the good work with the mindless programs mainstream America wants to see.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Winter In Cincinnati

How stupid is the weather in Cincy? Wednesday, it was colder than hell and snowy. Today, it was sunny and 57!

On another note, check out this article I stole:

"DEER PARK, Ohio -- Police say a woman stole an unusually large vehicle on Thursday morning.
Officers said a deliveryman was unloading product at a Dairy Mart in Deer Park just after 7 a.m. when his vehicle was taken, causing him to fall off. His vehicle happened to be a bright green 7UP delivery truck. The truck was spotted by Silverton police on Kennedy Avenue a few minutes later and pulled over.

A woman driving the truck was taken into custody. Officers said the woman told them she was having "a bad day".

The deliveryman was treated for minor injuries. The incident is still under investigation."

Whateva! I have lots of bad days but have never resorted to anything that stupid.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Made It Past The Two Week Mark!

Yay, me. The nasty cigarette cravings are becoming less and less each day (except for one day last week). Yup, I can beat this!

How in the hell did the Steelers beat the Colts? This totally sucks. Those bastards are the ones that took down our boy Carson. I say an eye for an eye, or a knee for a knee! Damnit I want retribution. Go Denver...take them out.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Arrested Development

Anybody who knows me realizes that I insist that "Arrested Development" is the funniest show on television.

It has just been brought to my attention that the three major search engines agree.

Try it yourself:

Google: http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rls=GGLD,GGLD:2005-09,GGLD:en&q=funniest+show+on+television

Yahoo: http://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=utf-8&fr=slv1-adbe&p=funniest+show+on+television

MSN: http://search.msn.com/results.aspx?q=funniest+show+on+television&FORM=QBNO (well, ok #2 on msn-close enough)

Now I don't know if this was acheived by "google bombing" but I am going to add to the effort!

funniest show on television

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

I Am Dying For A Cigarette!

Probably literally.

It's been over 72 hours since I've smoked. This is not an easy task, kids. I almost lit one up last night thinking nobody would know any better. But you know what? It doesn't matter! I would have known and I'm the one that absolutely needs to quit!

I came across an interesting post on the WOXY boards today about the benefits of quitting. And now I realize how stupid I've been for smoking all of these years. I never had a clue that my circulation problems were a cause of smoking. The last two years I've gone to Las Vegas, my left foot does stupid shit that makes me unable to walk. Obviously a circulation problem. Hopefully, I've stopped the nonsense in time before doing permanent damage. I suppose I should talk to my doctor about this. I will during my next appointment.

Anyway, I can't believe how much better I feel already. What a fucked-up habit.

Kids, please do not smoke. There are so many impurities in a cigarette and those impurities do a lot of damage.

Geez, I am so going to quit...I promise. Anyway, here's the post I came across which I have hanging everywhere I may be tempted to smoke. I have to get through this. Any words of encouragement would be great!

------------------------------------------------------------------

At 20 minutes after quitting:
blood pressure decreases
pulse rate drops
body temperature of hands and feet increases.

At 8 hours:
carbon monoxide level in blood drops to normal
oxygen level in blood increases to normal

At 24 hours:
chance of a heart attack decreases

At 48 hours:
nerve endings start regrowing
ability to smell and taste improve

At 2 weeks to 3 months:
circulation improves
walking becomes easier
lung function increases

From 1 to 9 months:
Starting as early as a month after you quit smoking, and continuing for the next several months, you may notice significant improvements in these areas:
coughing
sinus congestion
fatigue
shortness of breath

At 1 Year smoke free:
excess risk of coronary heart disease is decreased to half that of a smoker

At 2 years:
chances of achieving long-term success with quitting tobacco increases significantly

At 5 years:
from 5 to 15 years after quitting, stroke risk is reduced to that of people who have never smoked.

At 10 years:
risk of lung cancer drops to as little as one-half that of continuing smokers
risk of cancer of the mouth, throat, esophagus, bladder, kidney, and pancreas decreases
risk of ulcer decreases

At 15 years:
risk of coronary heart disease is now similar to that of people who have never smoked
risk of death returns to nearly the level of people who have never smoked

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Stupid Plastic Packaging

Why in the hell do electronics manufacturers insist on putting everything in those obnoxious plastic packages? I just bought some new accessories for my iPod and can't get the fuckers open.

I just want to see if the Belkin Auto Kit for iPod along with the Belkin TuneCast II Mobile FM Transmitter for iPod work better than my iRock FM Transmitter. That iRock has a lot of static and doesn't recharge my iPod. With this auto kit, I can recharge while in my car.

Another thing, what if this stuff is crap and I need to return it? Can I return it with the stupid hard plastic ripped to shreds?

I'll let you know if and when I get them open (geez, hope I don't cut my fingers and hands and end up in the ER).